Living With Anxiety


Living with anxiety is tough. It's a battle I, and many others, face daily and it really is an unpleasant feeling to have to deal with.

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Sometimes, it seems to come out of nowhere and is over the smallest of things and it feels like noone understands, so today I wanted to clear the air and let you know what its like living with anxiety.

Anxiety is pretty much my constant companion, its there most of the time and even when it's not I feel as though something must be wrong.

It plays a major role in pretty much everything I do, or don't do and living with anxiety is like carrying all this extra weight with me. It slows me down. I have to weight up every decision I make and my anxiety is a factor in all of them. Will I be able to cope with this? Am I too anxious to go to a certain place? Why do I feel like this? What's making me anxious today?

These are all questions that run through my mind on a daily basis and it always leads to me feeling fed up and depressed. It's a vicious cycle, and one I've tried to break out of time and time again through mindful thinking, trying to tackle negative thought processes, focusing on calming down the physical symptoms of anxiety like shaking and breathlessness, but even when I win the battle on one day, I'm still at war with myself the next.

And it doesn't seem to be getting any easier the more I try, I still have to live with these feelings on a day to day basis and even when I tell myself I've done this x amount of times before, I still have to battle with myself to do something I'd otherwise enjoy. My life is limited because of anxiety, I don't get out much, I don't step outside my comfort zone very much because I know all that awaits me is an array of unpleasant emotions to deal with. One good thing is the sense of achievement I feel when I do beat my anxiety, just going into a shop and paying without shaking can feel like a huge achievement and leaves me feeling fulfilled, but it's the process I have to go through to feel this way on a regular basis that's unpleasant to deal with.

Anyone else relate to this? Let me know in the comments below. I might do a post soon on ways to tackle anxiety as I feel it would be beneficial for me to refresh my memory on my mindfulness techniques, but anyway, that's all for today's post.

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