Why You Shouldn't Feel Ashamed To Ask For Help


This post is in regards to mental health, something I'm trying to be more open about on Quirks and Queries. I never asked for help. I was too ashamed to. I was so ill I was unaware that I was ill. One thing led to another and I was headed down a slippery slope. Depression is awful, we hear that time and time again, but it's true. It eats away at you, takes away your happiness until you're just a shell of what once was.

When it comes to mental illness, it's okay to admit you need help, and you shouldn't feel ashamed when asking for help.

Early last year, I shut down completely. I've never experienced an episode like it, and hopefully never will again. I stopped looking after myself, stopped going outside the house, stopped blogging and just stopped in general. It felt like all I did was eat and sleep. My days were spent lost in thought, or not in thought at all, just vacant. I was so depressed I slowed down, it was like the world had stopped spinning. I could see everyone else carry on as normal, but for me, my world had ended. There was no future, there was no good, there was only the vacant moments I was locked in.

My one regret is not asking for help when I needed it, it reached the point where I didn't want things to get better, I couldn't see a future for myself, all I could see was that nice piece of cake in the fridge. I'm being serious, food was my only source of happiness for about six months in 2018. It was all I'd think about. This was the way my depression manifested itself, by eating cake and sleeping and staring off into space or spending my days looking out the window. I was too ill to ask for help, and too ill to understand that I needed it.

When I did have moments of clarity, I felt too ashamed to ask for help from those around me. I knew, at times, that I wanted to get better, but I didn't know how to explain what I was going through, I didn't know where to begin, I found no enjoyment in things I used to enjoy and had no interest in doing things like watching TV, playing video games or shopping.

It was a long journey to recovery, and I won't go into all the ins and outs of that, but what I will say is just ask for help in anyway you can. You don't have to say much it could be a simple "look, I'm struggling, I need professional help." and you'll find people are there to support you. Whether that's your family, your friends and/or professionals. Depression doesn't have to be permanent, it can be like a passing cloud. Just learn to brave the weather and ask for help when you need it. Don't feel ashamed to ask there is tons of support out there for anyone struggling from anxiety, depression and other mental illnesses.

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  1. This is a sensitive subject for a lot of people. We tend to ignore and judge this as a sign of weakness ignoring the fact that we`re humans working on emotions. Is pretty natural to have down days, but if you don`t take them seriously they will come back more aggressive and for longer periods of time.
    You don`t always need a professional, but a good friend can make a big difference.

  2. This really resonated with me. I was in a dark place around this time last year, I knew I needed help but didn't ask for it. Luckily my work colleagues realised and made an appointment with my doctors for me. I do hope you're feeling better now.

  3. Really well written, asking for help is probably the single hardest thing you can do when you are right in the pit of a depression, we need to be more open about our feelings. Xx

  4. Fantastic piece of writing. No one should ever be afraid to ask for the help they need, but sadly stigma and shame often stops us. x


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